Waiting for His Return

"And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose."

– Romans 8:28

[0:00] The final scene in the series, Waiting for His Return, describes the Christian experience after salvation and explores the struggle of waiting for Jesus' return while living in a broken world. The opening section begins calmly and peacefully, representing a season where God seems close to us. The choir is soft, and the rain stick sounds like mist from crashing waves. The percussion is free and improvisational, almost joyful. The strings, conversely, feel slow and heavy. They are heavy because they remember our past, our sinfulness, our shame. They are overwhelmed knowing even though God knows us intimately, having seen the absolute worst we have ever done, He somehow still loves us.

[1:25] The piano's entrance starts a transition to the second section and a distinctively different mood. The choir drifts lower and lower in pitch over several measures, and the tempo slows before a sudden crack from the bass drum silences the choir, and we are confronted with the first real challenge to our faith. This section depicts an existential moment where we are honest enough with ourselves to consider that what we believe might not actually be true. We've been confronted with some challenging questions and admit we don't have great answers for them. Why hasn't Jesus returned yet? Why does God allow so much injustice in the world? Why is God silent? 

[2:22] We are faced with questions that shake our faith, and in the quietness of our own thoughts, we begin to entertain doubt. Doubt is represented by the plucked melody. The distant piano echoes the melody with a delay, representing different voices or perspectives we wrestle with. There is a lot of patience and space in this piece, and even though it is never silent, there are times when the background instruments are so consistent, repetitive, and subtle that it feels like the listener is all alone with their thoughts.

[2:57] When the music transitions back to the central theme, it is presented in a slight variation, a more seasoned faith. The tempo is slower, and the choir wavers in pitch, but the core themes remain the same. Our view of the world isn't as naive as it once was, and we've learned to live with tension in our faith. We've found answers to some more challenging questions, and we accept them, even though we aren't entirely sure if we are convinced by them. Despite our doubts, we choose to trust that God has a plan, and while life is good, that seems good enough.

[4:09] Following the return of the central theme with an extension of it featuring a solo violin, a rapid increase in tempo heard in the marimba hints to the listener that something is amiss. It's much easier to say we believe in a good God in the years of plenty than in the years of famine. Often, it's not until we experience significant discomfort or loss that we are forced to reevaluate what we really believe. The harp guides the listener further into the piece, where the melody of doubt returns, and we soon discover a profound tragedy. What little control we felt over our lives is torn away from us, and our formerly acceptable answers to life's more complicated questions seem grossly insufficient when met with an ocean of pain and despair. The intensity of what follows represents the gravity of another choice. We had chosen to trust God when the unanswered questions were far off and hypothetical, but can we still trust God in the midst of real suffering. When our loved ones are taken from us, can we still say, "It is well with my soul?"

[5:18] Although the music leading up to this point was spirited, the decision itself is not made with zeal or passion. A solo French horn, supported only by the rain stick and wind chimes, embodies our choice while we are at the end of our rope, in tears, and with childlike faith. Even though trials may come our way and tribulations afflict us, we choose to trust that God is good and He works all things together for the good of those who love him.

[5:37] At last, the main theme returns for its final sonnet. It is transformed with the addition of the solo violin and plays in tempo at a fraction of the speed compared to when the theme was first heard. When despair takes us by storm, and nothing in life seems to make sense, all we can do is cling to simple truths in faith. In this life, we inevitably find suffering and toil, yet we still have hope. Jesus will return to wipe every tear from our eyes, and when he comes again, he will make all things new.